Twin Sizes Reviews:

I just read chapter 25, and I see what you mean about the Lynn/Pierce dynamic.

We saw a little bit of it in chapter 24 and a bit at the start of this one, and yeah, it's fun seeing these two interact with each other. There was also the whole "fry incident" in the food quart a while back, too, which was a great bonding moment for them, I'm sure! Oh, and I suppose Lynn confirming Jackie's fetish to him was important. I mean just a little. Maybe. Kind of. Sort of. Definitely.

I think part of it is that we didn't really see Lynn around either Pierce or Javi at all in the earlier parts of the story, so now it feels kind special when these two are paired up. The moment near the start of chapter 25 (I can't see "this" chapter because I'm behind, and it's really throwing me off!), when Pierce brought up Lynn maybe having a secret interest in vore was a lot of fun. I will say that I thought Lynn's "the dirt you call home" line was close to crossing a line (that was pretty mean and elitist), but it also really fit her character in that moment, as I would expect an extreme reaction to someone talking about her being "put in her place." Of course, I'm kind of assuming Pierce was tongue-in-cheek referencing what Alena told him about dominating Lynn in the previous chapter, but unlike Alena, Pierce knows how to keep a secret (Sorry Alena, I had to; aw, now I feel bad).

Thankfully, Pierce was too busy being touched by Lynn calling him a friend to get offended at having his status attacked. Then again, that's kind of part of what makes this dynamic so fun, too. Lynn has a ridiculously high opinion of herself, and Pierce is pretty much the opposite in this regard, so much so that Lynn acting like she's better than him doesn't bother him at all. It's not that he thinks he's dirt; it's that he's just not worried about it, but he really appreciates Lynn holding him in any kind of regard at the same time. The sad thing is, that "friends" moment, which wasn't very strong on her end, may be the closest Pierce ever gets to knowing what Lynn truly thinks of him (which, based on that conversation in the kitchen between Lynn and her parents is actually pretty highly).

I was happy to see Jackie be so quick to forgive Alena, although I figured she would be. I do like that Jackie moved on really quickly so that Alena didn't even have a chance to act like she didn't deserve forgiveness (at least, based on how it was worded in the narrative, I assumed this was intentional on her part). It was also nice to see the two of them start the scene off on a more cheery note, and the two of them each finding it funny that they had a little morning fun with their respective tinies seems very in line with their meek (external) personalities. Just two girls who usually follow the rules having a giggle at both of them being just a little bit naughty. It was cute!

But man, starting off the chapter with the beast lying within Jackie was awesome! I mean, her not believing that she snatched Pierce up in her sleep was a fun bit, but Jackie barely keeping the pred at by was hot as fuck! When she started talking about "less humane" ways Pierce could satisfy her if he failed as a boyfriend, my interest certainly peeked! And I know that Jackie would never actually do these things, but just to see this side of her personality come out, to see her fully embrace it like this, is as rewarding to read as it is sexy to envision. It's like she finally feels free to let all of this out now that she has the acceptance of her family, and I'm so happy for her!

Also, the thought of Pierce has to do something everyday to delay his "snack sentence" one day at a time is so hot (even if it was just playful banter on Jackie's part; let me dream, damn it!).

I very much enjoyed Jess's heart-to-heart with Jackie, and it was nice that both parents got that moment with her. Selfishly, I liked the nostalgia of Jess talking about her early experience with the fetish as much as I did her using that to comfort Jackie. The spacesuit thing is always how I picture Drew: He was prepared to give Jess what she wanted without even flinching, despite the fact that Jess was right that most tinies probably would have broken up with her immediately at that time (there was that news report going around ...). It was a nice moment to be reminded of (as were all the other memories, like the food testing scene), so thanks for working that in there!

But this also hit on the big theme of the chapter: trust. Everyone accepts Jackie's fetish because they trust her to be responsible and not hurt anybody. She viewed herself as a monster all this time, never even realizing that the fact that she felt that way at all was proof that she wasn't one. She likes to talk the pred game, and swallowing a tiny was her dream (and now it's her favorite memory with Pierce), but she would never actually hurt a tiny. She couldn't live with herself if she did! And that's why Jess and Drew, as well as her entire circle of friends, aren't worried about her at all! It was a wonderful message to convey here and then hit again when she "confessed" to Havi in the SUV on the way back to campus.

Speaking of Havi, it was great to see Heather so eager to help out those in need during the holidays, even if Jules is probably right to be a little more cautious in general. Like Javi said when talking about her to Sasha and Jeff in the limo, she really is a down-to-earth person ... and then you see her place! Heather's occasional ignorance for how extravagant her lifestyle can be at times is adorable, but it's really cool how she can be such a great person at the same time.

And Sasha and Jeff! It was great to see them again! It's been, what, a year (since I read Mixing Sizes)? Sasha still has trouble peopling I see. That brashness from her when Heather first approached her was very on-brand for her! At the same time, it's kind of crazy how much a person can change. She's gotten all the way to the point where seeing a big having a tiny with them makes them more trustworthy. That would have been so hard to believe if you had told me that about her at the start of Mixing Sizes. It's awesome to see how much Drew and Jeff changed her perspective back then and how that new perspective has evolved 20 years later.

Jeff is still Jeff. A tad bit dense but very much lovable! And always funny, despite never seeming to do it on purpose. He may be onto something with that crazy check engine light idea ...

I loved the picture you painted of the scene as a whole. This was the perfect mixed-sized atmosphere, with bigs and tinies hanging out together in harmony, and the lines were even put to good use (I was a bit worried the kids were going to wander outside the line, but hey, no accidents! Hooray!).

And the familiar faces continued to show up! I was particularly excited to see Aaliyah and Macy each have a brief moment. I remember you saying something about regretting not using all the characters to their fullest potential in Mixing Sizes, and I feel like these two had to be the ones you had in mind when you said that. They both even got to have a moment with Javi, which was so much fun!

Aaliyah, so composed and polite, regardless of size, is exactly like I remember her from the original story. The only time she "slipped up" and seemingly forgot about Javi in her hand for a second was when she saw Macy in the kitchen, which is kind of understandable, given how passionate they are for each other. And Macy, damn! She always seemed like she'd be a lot of fun! Very much the playful type! Also, she seemed cool with tinies, but there was that time she called Drew a pet when Jess first brought him up, even if she walked it back and said she was kidding. So to see her talk to Javi like a "puppy in a cage" (great line, by the way!) and enjoy feeling his little heart beat faster between her fingers fit what I've always envisioned her to be so well! It does make me wonder how she treated/thought about Lynn growing up, though. being her unofficial aunt and all. I do like that it's left a bit ambiguous where the line between person and pet when it comes to tinies is for her!

Chris drinking and offering his "wit' in the tiny kitchen checks out. As does Keiko getting a nice zinger in on her husband!

Heather's growing enthusiasm for cooking always puts a big smile on my face! She's come a long way, making tabbouleh, something I had to look up on Google just to know what it is. Any time you can make a food I don't know, that's impressive!

But seeing Jess pass on all of her cooking advice and recipes to Heather was something I didn't know I needed to see until I saw it! After being reminded that Jess is the master of making tiny food, it felt so good to see her pass along her knowledge to an eager Heather like that. And Heather soaking it all up is made all so much sweeter when you remember that cooking has suddenly become maybe the biggest way she expresses her love for Javi, just like how Jess kept working and working at tiny cooking until she had it down perfectly, just to make sure she could impress Drew's friends. It was a labor of love, just like Heather's cooking is, and it was great to see this passing of the baton firsthand!

The 1951 wine thing was good. My first thought was "That's not that old." then I remembered that we're in Street Fighter 9 times, that's actually the equivalent of, what, a mid-1800s wine today? Between that and the twins being impressed that their parents have been together since "the '20s," nice work on subtly reminding us that this is the future!

It was a really small thing, but Lynn yelling at Jeff to watch his language after he said "shit" at the dinner table is the same thing Drew did when Jackie said shit in the previous chapter. Lynn really does take after Drew pretty hard!

The food-stealing bit came back with a fucking vengeance here! I mean, I knew it would in some form, given that Thanksgiving is a food-based holiday, but damn! I didn't expect this level of intensity! Javi still not getting it, even after Heather's own instincts took over a little while back, was funny. But Pierce putting so much thought into every action both Jackie and he made was both hilarious and deadly serious at the same time. It really was almost like I was watching a chess game play out. I almost thought he was just being paranoid, even when Jackie de facto made him get up to pass her the stuffing. It was only when he saw the shadow of her other arm spread across the table that I realized that he was exactly right to be concerned!

Alena saving the day was so unexpected, too! She was the one friend left completely out of this whole food-stealing thing, although she had seen it happen a couple times. Her coming in to save Pierce with that napkin excuse was awesome! I honestly wouldn't have expected her to get involved, and even if she did, I would have assumed she would have taken Jackie's side, since they appear to be closer. It was a legitimately warm moment worked into a funny continuing gag, and I loved it!

And just as I was wondering if Alena might feel guilty for doing that just a day removed from outing Jackie's secret, Jackie dropped that line about regretting Alena for the night before and I was absolutely fucking rolling! And when she had that "Bold of you to call me your friend line" in the car later one, still steaming about it, you got me again! At least she ended up forgiving Alena because she's so kindhearted. Jackie is so intense about Pierce's food!

Alena knowing she was going to miss the warmth of her girlfriend's house before they even left was so fucking sad. I hate her family even more than I did before!

And are we really going to see Drew and Jess again at Christmastime? Seeing Jess go full empty nest like that hit me a little hard, too. Drew getting that last line in about Pierce not being a choking hazard was fantastic, though! It's not often you see a parent tease a child about their fetishes (for obvious reasons), but it worked here!

Ending the chapter with Pierce in Jackie's mouth, Lynn in Alena's Boobs (I had to backspace Annie's boobs twice, just for the record), and Javi in Heather's armpit just felt right. And Jackie "bartering" with wearing socks to bed, Lynn having whined about getting in there the whole way to her parents, and Heather having to hold back putting Javi in her armpit or butt on the way there set this moment off perfectly. Instead of just a nice moment, it was a sweet payoff. Well done!

God, both Thanksgiving chapters were even better than I had hoped! You nailed these! Now, if I can just catch up on the other two chapters ...

I just finished reading chapter 24, and it was, indeed, amazing to see those particular familiar faces again!

The first thing I want to mention, though, is how impressed I was with Drew's slip-up with Jackie about Jess's own vore fetish. The way Drew talked about Pierce's balls, oh, uh, courage! I mean courage! But yeah, the detail Drew gave about why going inside Jackie without a suit for the first time was delivered with such a natural flow that it didn't feel like it was a setup to exposing Jess and giving Jackie more insight into her family. It just felt like what Drew would say in that situation. This is hard to do and something I struggle with, so this really stuck out to me and made me super jealous! Well done!

While we're on that part of the story, the manner in which Alena outed Jackie to her family made me feel so bad for her. That whole paragraph before, where Alena is reflecting on how warm and loving the Richards family was and wanting to be part of the playful dynamic they shared, was so touching and so sad at the same time. I feel so bad for how her own family life has played out, although it sounds like maybe her father passing played a role in that and maybe things were better when he was alive. However, it was great to see her enjoy the real family atmosphere that came so naturally to her girlfriend's family, and I was hopeful that she could find a way to weave herself into it.

Then she tried, and I wished she hadn't.

It's so easy to get lost in the moment and forget that something is supposed to be a secret, especially when you yourself don't see it as that big of a deal. So I understand entirely how she could make such a small, world-shattering mistake. But as soon as she said it, I stopped dead my tracks, just like the Richards family did. Jackie's horror was palpable, just from the simple line "Jackie stopped moving," the context for this reaction being well-established several chapters ago. What a full-circle moment this was, coming out of nowhere! Granted, I maybe should have expected it to come in some form, given Jess's own love of vore, but I really didn't!

But man, the guilt Alena felt afterward was rough! Not only did she accidentally tell the secret of one of her few friends (which Alena admits she has trouble making in the first place), but she completely destroyed that family dynamic that she only wanted to take part in. Not only that, but she felt her friendship with Jackie was special because of how the giant tiny feels about bigs in general. Alena was so convinced that she had destroyed her relationship with Jackie, but I agree with Lynn that Alena is severely overthinking things and that Jackie won't even be mad about it in the morning.

I'm glad that Alena didn't blame herself too much for ruining the family atmosphere she had only wanted to join. She did note this, but she pushed those thoughts down. I was a little worried that she was going to spiral when I read that part. This is the kind of thing that tends to make people in her kind of situation think, "Maybe I just don't deserve to have this; maybe it's my fault my family hates me." So despite how sad it was to see her beat herself up over "betraying" Jackie, I was a bit relieved that her newfound self-confidence held up in this situation.

Backtracking quite a bit, it was so awesome to see Jess and Drew again! It was also interesting to see how they've evolved over the last 20 or so years. But the first thing that stuck out to me was how Jackie and Lynn reacted to each one. Lynn, in particular, was way more affectionate with Drew than she was with Jess. That's not to say that Lynn didn't like getting smothered between the cheeks of her sister and mother, but she was definitely more of her guarded, "perfect" self in that moment, only to drop that façade in a rare moment of honest love when her daddy showed up. It was really cute, actually!

And while Jackie seemed pretty excited to see both of her parents again, that finger she offered for the "group hug" Drew had with his daughters felt not quite as personal on her end as the actual hug she had with Jess. That's not to say that she cares any less for Drew, as we saw in that conversation they shared later in the chapter that she absolutely does, but her offering a finger instead of scooping him up and pressing both tinies to her cheek was an interesting contrast, I think.

This was so interesting to me because I'm wondering exactly why this played out this way. Is Lynn just a daddy's girl (she seems the type, to be fair) and I'm overthinking Jackie's "hug" with her father? Or is there some sort of subconscious thing going on with the respective sizes of all parties involved here? Is Lynn naturally closer with Drew because they're the same size, and does the same thing apply to to Jess and Jackie? Not that the parents and kids don't love their opposite sized parents as much, but maybe they just feel more of a kinship with someone they can look in the eye without an elevator or laying on their stomachs? Jackie identifying as a tiny would seem to go against this, but maybe Jess is just the exception to that rule?

I don't know. I don't think this is a major thing. I just find the dynamics of this mixed-sized family really interesting!

I thought it was incredibly sweet that Jess (and Drew as well, as it was noted that they talked about this) was so welcoming and willing to help Alena in any way she could regarding her family situation. Jess has always been such a warm-hearted, understanding person, and seeing that on display here, for a relative stranger in her house, put a smile on my face. It's also nice to know that if things do end badly for Alena and her family, she'll still have another one that will welcome her with open arms and without judgment.

I loved that little stubborn streak in Drew, wanting to walk all the way to the kitchen on his own. While the other tinies were happy to catch a lift from Jackie, he kind of lamented that. I mean, they were so close, apparently (even though it seemed like a lot more than that to Pierce!). And he gave in because he knew Jess would chew him out for being stubborn? I love that! Also, him bonding with Pierce over cars was a nice moment I didn't know I needed.

Despite what Jackie and Lynn think of it, I thought Jess's "story" on how they got their names was adorable! Renton does sound kind of gross to me, though (apologies to anyone named Renton. For the name, not for saying that!).

But the nostalgia train really picked up steam when they broke out the Mario Kart! Seeing Jess and Jackie's competitive streaks brush up against each other was so much fun! I knew Jackie got that from Jess, but I never really thought about how competitive they would be with each other over the years (although I really should have). And Jess starting with "I'll just watch" because she didn't want to dominate was such a power move on her part, whether she intended it to be or not! There was no way Jackie couldn't call Jess out with that kind of talk!

And that "Anything for my darling girl" from Jess when she says she's going to "stomp" Jackie (probably a good thing that Lynn isn't into video games that much) was so fucking perfect! There's just something about that blend between motherly love and brutal competition that's just so fun to read!

It was also funny to see Drew and Pierce battling for third place, neither one being able to come close to their significant others. But I loved the idea of Alena and Lynn just hanging out in the back of the line, having a blast just throwing shells and ruining things for everyone else and not caring about the competition at all!

Drew's sock punishment was a nice memory to bring up here! Jess's playful side is fun, and it also reminded us of how laid back Drew is, something that we see in real time not too long after Jess brings this up. I do also think it's sweet that Jess didn't react poorly to Lynn announcing Pierce's foot fetish here. And while I completely understand why both Jackie and Pierce were mortified by this, Jess trying to make them feel more comfortable about it being outed and even kind of encouraging them was very Jess of her.

Then she just had to ask what Jackie got if she won. If only she had known ...

But Drew was the star in the aftermath of Jackie's vore fetish being revealed. From him laughing his ass off and getting a snack while everyone else (other than Lynn) was worried about Jackie and the secret being out to his heart-to-heart with Jackie herself, the whole thing helped me remember why I loved Drew so much in the original story. The dude is unflappable! While Jess wears her heart on her sleeve and lets her emotions match her size sometimes, Drew is that steady pebble that holds everything down. So when Jess came out and started chastising Drew for eating popcorn while Jackie was in crisis, it didn't surprise me at all when his only response was to offer her some as well. That was just a natural Drew reaction. It seemed to calm Jess down, too.

And hey, we got to see the real secret behind making a mixed-sized marriage work: tinies sharing their food with their giant spouses. I really hope Pierce was taking notes!

Drew handled that Jackie talk so well, too! It wasn't some deep, heart-felt speech, but rather a simple reassurance that Jess and he still love her, that she's not a freak because he's met those and she's not that, and then even asking if Pierce was okay with it. That last one was really important because it was an engaging question, rather than something that sounds like maybe he was just trying to make her feel better. A question like adds legitimacy to what he's saying; it shows he actually cares and isn't judging her. And, of course, it led to Drew slipping up and letting Jess's secret out, which probably helped Jackie more than anything else.

And that "bed bigs" line was a nice bit of foreshadowing, given that clever poem at the end of the chapter!

I also really liked Lynn throughout all this. Her actually apologizing to Pierce shows some real growth on her part, and I love her take on "trying to be better." It's very Lynn of her! Also, it was impressive how quickly she pieced together Jess's own vore fetish, if for no other reason than the blind spot we all have (or wish we have if we don't!) when it comes to our parents and anything sexual. But yeah, her figuring things out so quickly was pretty cool, as was Jess hilariously wishing that Lynn was a dumb blonde sometimes!

It was also really cool to see just how Jess's love of vore has evolved over the years. I mean, 36 different vore suits for Drew, even going out of her way to get the limited edition ones like that is pretty intense, which fits Jess quite well when it come to this (I remember how quickly she agreed to try the first vore suit on their honeymoon, before Drew even did!). We also got a direct comparison of how the suits fit now versus back then, which was a nice touch.

The vore scene itself was great! It was hot but also really sweet and loving. That Drew is so familiar with his wife's mouth and insides is a perfect way to telegraph his love for her, especially with the context of how much Jess struggled with wanting this in the early days of her dating Drew and how willing Drew was to find a way to give it to her. That "no need for words" moment was that much more satisfying when thinking back on that.

Jackie interrupting it was so fun, too! It makes sense that Jackie bought the bathroom line like that, but I think Lynn would have known exactly what was happening if she had been the one to interrupt them. Drew laughing and Jess smacking her stomach to quiet him down was so fucking cute, too!

I love that Lynn snuck into Alena's room like that, wanting to "bone." Her entitled attitude was so endearing here, with her accepting Alena's "apology" for making her wait, enjoying the peep show! Alena ultimately not giving Lynn what she wanted but letting Lynn sleep between her tits was a nice compromise between Lynn's dominant personality and Alena's emerging dominance of Lynn in particular.

I was also pleasantly surprised to see that real moment of vulnerability from Lynn when she explained why she almost outed Jackie herself. It makes sense that Alena's family situation would give Lynn some small degree of doubt about her own parents, even if she didn't think they'd reject Jackie for her fetish. Seeing how Alena has been affected by her family first hand, especially with Lynn's lack of experience dealing with people like them, would be enough to shake anyone, even the great Lynn Richards! It was such a humanizing moment for Lynn, and each time we get one of those, it feels special. That over confident, cocky façade makes moments like this possible.

So yeah, this was a fantastic chapter, and you nailed pretty much everything I was hoping to see with Jess and Drew stepping back into the limelight for a minute. I'm eager to see how Thanksgiving proper goes, with some other familiar faces promising to show up and now Havi coming back onto the scene!

(Review for ch. 27)

Oh the things I'd let drunk Jackie do to me...
Christmas chapter! Very much out of season lmao, but christmas vibes are always enjoyable.
I really loved that little part about how tinies deal with snowfall. I'd never really considered it before, and of course your worldbuilding solutions and history are always cute and fascinating.
I'm consistently surprised by how aligned our size brains seem to be sometimes. Jackie effortlessly sweeping the snow off of Pierce's front yard with a single hand was great, and the human servant stuff in Breaking Through had me thinking about the exact same image xD So much easier for a big to clean up messes like that. One swipe of the hand as opposed to half an hour of work. Making the smalls do it is practically criminal!

Jackie's signature warming up technique accidentally causing a scene was fun. It's nice to see her more confident now that the truth is out in the open, though her essentially being told to get a room by the security got a chuckle out of me.

I am Alena. I will eat the cookies, and the host can not stop me. Naught shall remain but crumbs. On that note, I feel like your prose just keeps getting better with each chapter. You're developing this really fun style of narration, where you can derive humour not just from dialogue or circumstance, but from the prose itself. That's pretty hard to do, and I've been loving it more and more as you hone the craft. 'Dreaming of all the fuck they were about to make' and other such Drunkie-isms were a highlight this chapter lmao.
(Also I just figured that out. Jackie + Drunk = Drunkie? Masterful titling skills, as always xD)
Drunk Jackie and Pierce were hilarious to read, but also really sweet. The way they only had eyes for each other the whole time they were plastered was really cute.
And of course, Lynn recording them for her later amusement was great lol.

Speaking of, man, Lynn be a gremlin in this chapter xD I love the way she physically hurls herself at people, and her diving at Alena was awesome. All of the gifts and their respective reactions were super sweet, and you did them in a clever way that characterises both the recipient and the gifter. Wonderful stuff. [Also, I can hazard a guess as to what the you-know-what might be >:)]

But yeah, Lynn. That plastic cup-striptease was a really novel scene, and fit great with her as a character. That kind of 'look at how sexy I am, but don't touch yet' vibe was both amusing and fitting lol. And of course the immediate downing of the Lynn-vodka cocktail was fantastic. Speaking of.
You're just teasing me at this point. Lynn's intrusive thoughts almost winning over her was incredible. Though as much as I appreciate buildup, the horny brain is still sad she didn't end up going all the way down lmao. Objectively though, it's a super fascinating avenue for her, and you're exploring it in the perfect way I think. Lynn having a mini-existential crisis inside of her gf, and explicitly thinking about all her pride being reduced to bodily fuel for Alena (as well as Alena's thoughts implying that she would absolutely swallow her if Lynn asked) was easily the hottest part of this chapter for me, no contest. Though Alena's gentle but carnal insertion was a pretty close second <3

Jackie and Pierce's fun times were wonderful as well. It was super sweet how trusting Pierce was. Jackie could've swallowed him right there and he'd have been chill about it. Couple goals xD
I'm not gonna lie, I really thought she'd do it. I'd love to see your take on how any of the couples would handle unsafe vore like that. That said, the scenes were still really fun. Pierce being a little bossy at the start, his little screw-up and subsequent apology, Jackie's legendary hawk tuah across the room, all wonderful lmao. And them going out like lights after Heather put them back to bed was adorable.

Heather and Javi's section was cute too, if briefer than the others. I expect we may end up with a chapter or two where Javi is mysteriously absent haha. Jokes aside, Heather's sorta-clinginess is cute. The anglerfish part was an amusing, and oddly fitting description lol.

Lots of fun moments through this chapter, too. The halloween cookies, Pierce going on about cars for like five minutes, the Drunkie duo, Jackie locking tf in the moment vore is on the line, Jackie wandering around naked, "Hand me my Pierce, please.", etc. Lots of funny Jackie moments overall lmao.

Which makes it extremely difficult to pick the best twin this chapter. However, after much deliberation, I'm gonna have to go with Lynn. Her energy is super fun, and I'm deeply intrigued by her blossoming vore thoughts. It was a very close competition though. Nearly everything that came out of Jackie's mouth once she was drunk was hilarious lmao.

Loved it, as always. Can't wait for what's next! <3

This new site is snazzy!

Loved this chapter! It's wholesome and smutty in the perfect ratio! I'm always happy to see a holiday chapter too

Porting my review of Ch 19 from GW:

I've only read this chapter and it really feels like a standalone! You manage to set the stakes, establish character, and resolve a narrative arc all inside of 6k words, very well done. It's telling that your characters stand out so well in so little time, similar to how animated characters need a good silhouette. I've just seen their silhouette in this snapshot, and they're very distinct without getting bogged down in exposition.

As for the BDSM component, I found it compelling. As a kinkster myself who is also trying to write consensual kink into my size smut, I like how you executed the dynamics.

I think it's often overlooked how one can often "fail" as a submissive or require non-erotic correction. It brings a lot of humanization to an otherwise flat slave dynamic. I think the tinies-as-objects trope is difficult to pull off, while maintaining the dignity of the smalls. Their dignity removal is usually the point, but that excludes gentle tropes from the BDSM stories. You've struck a good balance, and I think people of all persuasions can see themselves in a character or two.

As for eroticism it's hard for me to judge as I'm not generally of the consenting type. However; the scene was still interesting and titillating from a world building perspective. I find gentle stories often go right up to the line, avoiding crossing it because then they'd leave gentle territory. You dance on the line a little here, especially from Justine's perspective.

I think I would have desired a little more of her headspace and emotional descriptions, though I'm sure the chapter would bloat quickly in such a case. Naila, too, seems like she's got more going on under the hood than the text provided. It's not fair to critique character motivation from just her silhouette but I was left wondering what was in it for her.

I especially enjoyed the artifacts of BDSM you employed to instill a sense of structure. Too often, kink is displayed as rather haphazard or downright nonsensical. There is a core nugget of consent in BDSM, and the artifacts you chose to demonstrate that ring true. The collar and contract are somewhat over-represented in kink fiction due to their visual and emotional provocation. I think you mostly played them by the book, which is fine for the context. As a BDSM person I find myself desiring a permutation on the formula but I love what you did with the resignation and corrective action.

Well done! This chapter could easily stand by itself, and evokes a wider story that I may need to wade into when I've more time. Thank you for taking the time to do a review exchange, folks like yourself make this community really special <3

I'm honored to be your 50th review for the original and the first review here! Here's to 49 more <3