Review by TerryLarka
Review for Chapter 1:
A really strong opening scene for a really strong first chapter. I love how we just jump straight into the chaos of J’Kabi experiencing the aftereffects of the crash, stranded in the vacuum of space and the hot and cold effects its having on her body. Her tail wrapped around a dismembered leg made for an evocative visual that stuck with me as I read through the chapter.
The next scene flashing back to her joining Horizon’s Promise was a great tonal shift. Overall, I love how this chapter kept jumping back and forth between pleasant moments in the past and the harrowing present our protags face. It worked wonders for the pacing, giving the reader welcome breaks from the moments of high intensity by exploring these characters and the universe they inhabit, while also never bogging too deep into worldbuilding before cutting back to the thrills.
In terms of worldbuilding/exposition, I think that was handled well too. The fish out of water protagonist is tried and true for a reason, and I liked learning about the different aliens, cultures, and spacefaring lingo through Kabs eyes, who’s pretty fresh to this stuff as well. It also really worked well in the moments where Cygnus is explaining her biology telepathically to Kabs while the latter is getting swallowed. I don’t know, that’s just a much more impactful way of teaching me how Ancient biology works than giving a more basic lore dump, and I found that stuff much more compelling as a result.
Speaking of Ancients, what a cool species! I love the idea of a species that’s so old that no one, not even them, know their original name. And their designs are awesome! Their skin resembling the cosmos itself gives them this primordial feel, like they were meant to traverse the stars as the progenitor of all life (not that they’re literally that, but it gives off the vibe that this race has a lot of gravitas to it as the original spacefarers. I hope I’m making sense? Basically, Ancients are really cool; I like them a lot lol.)
I think you did a great job introducing the crew and their quirks in a short period of time. I barely got to know Mrrgh or Mei before their unfortunate passing (presumably at least, I don’t have hard confirmation yet even though Cygnus seems certain), but they and the other crew members left a strong impression regardless. I can imagine the hijinks and banter they got up to with Kabs and Siggy before things went sour.
So admittedly, I’m kind of an idiot, so a lot of sci-fi mumbo jumbo goes straight over my head, but I never felt too lost reading this, even when I didn’t entirely understand some of the terms you were using lol. What I did understand was that this setting and these character’s biology is extremely well thought out. There were too many details to list that amazed me as the kind of the stuff I’d never consider or think of. I’m seriously impressed with the amount of nuance that went into crafting this universe and the peoples inhabiting it.
The main characters are both very loveable. Kabs’ wide eyed enthusiasm at meeting new species pairs well with Cygnus’ cooler, more experienced personality. Their dialogue is really good and shows how close they’ve been able to come in the short time they’ve known each other.
The telepathy through touch was such a neat idea and executed really well throughout the chapter. Whether that’s Cygnus shouldering J’kabi’s pain, talking to her directly through her mind, or my favorite, overwriting the Aizu’s memories/emotions with her own. The moments where Kabs remembered a fact about the Ancients or something they told the captain, only to do a double take and realize that was actually a thought Cygnus shared with them got me everytime. The use of first person narration shines super bright in those moments. And Cygnus calming Kabs down while swallowing her was fantastic, not only instilling soothing emotions but also dredging up pleasant memories of family and home. One of my absolute favorite moments in the chapter was Kabs contemplating on how insignificant she was only for Cygnus to interrupt the thought to tell her she isn't insignificant at all. Such a lovely interaction that both plays into the general appeal of the size fetish (the tiny's insignificance compared to the big) and the gentle side of it (the big looking past that to treat the tiny with respect/care).
Gentle vore is pretty much my favorite kind of size content (it combines my two favorite size genres lol), and I love the justification for it here. Using Cygnus as a living spacesuit for Kabs makes sense logically, and I love the protection angle here, like the Ancient’s body provides a safe barrier for Kabs from the inhospitable environment (that sort of protective idea is a dynamic I really dig in safe vore).
And yeah, I probably don’t need to tell you that the descriptions of Cygnus’ internals were both vivid and captivating. Excellent sensory details on display there, and I love the different textures Kabs felt, like the gelatinous stomach acids. I loved the imagery of her slurping Kabs’ tail like a noodle.
Like I said, this was a really strong opening chapter, and it has me excited to see where things go from here! Looking forward to reading further!
Thank you! I'm glad you're enjoying it so far! There's lots to come in the next few chapters, so I'll keep comments on the story and certain background things to a minimum, but I'm very happy you find the Ancients cool. They're probably my favorite thing that I've ever come up with. There's a lot to their biology that has explanation, and then there's a lot ELSE where even their top scientists just have to go "yeah we just do that sometimes. No clue why." For instance, a common sign of aging in the Ancients is their sunlike eyes going supernova, the bright glow replaced by the accretion disk of a black hole. Doesn't affect their vision at all, it just happens. Strong emotion can sometimes cause new stars to form on their skin, or some stars to pop and become nebulas.
Plus where/when an Ancient is born can effect their patterning. In Cygnus' case, being born in the Horsehead Nebula makes her an Orionite Ancient. Orionite Ancients are most easily distinguished by large amounts of red/pink nebula patterning. Their fleet spends much of its time around Rigel and Betelgeuse (two of the brightest stars in the night sky), and so they've developed what are known as dwarf star eyes, which are smaller and dimmer than some of the other kinds of Ancients. For non-aesthetic characteristics, they are the most resistant to heat and radiation of any Ancient (aside from the Core Ancients that live next to the black hole in the middle of the galaxy, but that's its own can of worms), which makes them ideal for working with fusion drives and shipboard reactors.
Review by ProbablyIX
(Full spoilers up to chapter 3)
Man this story is so good. Easily one of the more immersive settings I've read, even in general.
All the effort you put into getting the math and science right really paid off. Chapter 3 especially, it really feels like Cygnus and J'kabi are actual professionals in their field, which is hard to pull off. All the detail around what had happened to damage the ship so badly is similarly fascinating and impressive. Yet again it feels like this is something that could actually happen. And the pair's improvised plans to survive are super interesting as well. Really everything about the technical aspect of this story is just perfect.
I think my favourite part of the prose by far is the incredible way you use first-person perspective to your advantage with the mind-linking. How inner monologue or simple prose transitions into conversations or more abstract interactions is so elegant, I'm jealous.
J'kabi's oft energetic inner monologue is perfect for it, too. She's every bit as cute as Mei thought she was. And I love the unique biology you indulge in with this story. All the little tidbits about how the different species' bodies work, and the way they interact is so engaging to read about. You fully sell the idea that there is an entire living, breathing universe outside the events of the story, which only heightens my investment in the idea that the pair could be rescued, or make it to safety.
And of course many of the fun little details do wonders to service the smut elements, too lol. Cygnus' biology is especially fascinating, and the 'living spacesuit' idea is so much fun.
Another thing I love is how J'kabi reacts to being swallowed. You really captured a raw and primal anxiety in her that I don't often read in these kinds of stories. Something simply hardwired into her brain, overriding any rational thought. Ugh! It's so good. I especially love her second trip down, how she's becoming calmer, and able to trust Cygnus more, now that barrier of expectation has broken down in J'kabi's mind. She can only hope she doesn't end up crossing any wires as she gets more comfortable being inside of Cygnus >:)
And god, the ending of chapter 3. Pretty much everything I could praise about the story is in overdrive here. The realistic and thought-out impact and debris, the connection between J'kabi and Cygnus, and poor Mei :(
I'm so sad, I was hoping at least she might've survived. That way the duo wouldn't be so alone as they are. And the way Cygnus let out her precious air to speak in the vaccum, my heart ;-;
This story is a wonderful gem. I can't wait to see where it goes next <3
I'm happy you're enjoying it! I've had a wonderful time writing it, and talking and roleplaying and theorycrafting in the Milky Way. I have probably more lore at this point than actual written words, but that's been super helpful because it allows me to weave these little things into the narrative. I have SO much stuff for the Mulvidians that you'll be seeing in future stories in this setting.
On the flip side of that, everything about the Seirogi I came up with while writing these chapters. They have their origin in a single sentence in a roleplay from 2021. Everything else about them has existed in my head as a collection of vague impressions. Which can wind up being a good thing, sometimes! It allowed me to use them as an example of the diversity in the galaxy, and show how different species developed different technologies.
As far as the science goes, I have to credit phenomenal hard science fiction books such as The Expanse series or The Martian for doing a lot of the research for me. Not that I haven't done a good amount myself, though! The NASA website has been a fantastic resource. I've got a bunch of amazing PDFs with technical details on space suits, the ISS, and life support systems that gave me a fantastic baseline to pivot from when working out ship systems and oxygen calculations.
Review by MitsuhaTakiName
[Spoilers up to chapter 3]
I had to finally actually create an account here just to review this story. I really like it. Binged all three existing chapters this morning. I think my favorite thing is the feeling of intimacy you’ve managed to create between J’kabi and Cygnus. The combination of the mental link and Kabs literally being inside Siggy, making her completely omnipresent is so good. I dislike cruel that involves fatal digestion, but in situations like this where it’s just a method of fully enclosing one person so deeply inside another, it’s quite nice. But it’s the way you describe it that takes it from nice to amazing. The fear it generates to Kabs combined with the reassurance pushed to her through the mental link, that feeling of danger, pushed back only by the thoughts from source of that danger. I’m not great with expressing myself, but it really gets at possibly my favorite thing in size stories, which is gentle bigs grappling with the power they have over a small they care about, and trying to make sure they feel safe and cared for.
But generally the relationship you’ve built between the two of them is great. The crush that exists on one side, the potential to return it on the other, and the complications of addressing those feelings in such a heightened situation. But at the same time, the situation itself drawing the feelings out. I so desperately want them to get together, but uncertain status of the present is great to savor as well. Mei complicates things in a good way. The little glimpse we get of her make her a good character in her own right. And the fact that Siggy is mourning her and the relationship they had only complicated the possible relationship between our two main characters. Though, thankfully the fact they’re both polyamorous means it’s not like Mei is an obstacle to the relationship that has been eliminated.
Lastly, I just want to remark that I really like your world building. I can tell a lot of care went into it, and the world that you have created feels real to me. The relationships between the various spacefaring species, the science behind how their ships function and are laid out, and the various quirks especially of the Ancients, all of it feels very well put together and believable. I want to applaud you on it.
Thanks so much for writing and posting this story. I’ll be eagerly awaiting each release, for however long this story goes.
Thank you so much! The relationship between Siggy and Kabs is one of my favorite things I've ever written. There are so many layers to it, much of which has to be kept to themselves because of their current dire situation. That lets me be much more introspective with it, while the added complication of the link creates an unspoken tension. These things are on their minds, but they can't think about them too hard or else the other person WILL hear it, and that'll just complicate their dire situation MORE.